According to the Golden Rule, you should treat others like you want to be treated. However, you need to be cautious with it. Sure, it’s the rule to follow when you’re dealing with general physical behaviors – not pinching someone because you don’t want to be pinched. If you don’t like the way someone does something, you shouldn’t do it yourself.
When you communicate with other people, using the golden rule can be counterproductive. According to Steven Covey, the Golden Rule needs to be understood as “Understand others deeply as individuals – or as you want to be understood and treated in how you understand.
A bit of a tweak to the golden rule – many calling it the platinum rule. Or in simple terms, putting it like this, “Treat others like THEY Really Like To Be Treated.”
There are some people who are private and don’t like nosy people; they don’t like being pestered with questions. Other people don’t mind questions, welcoming them with open arms. It’s the introvert vs. the extrovert. How does an extrovert treat everybody like they want to be treated – should they even do it? No.
To become an effective communicator, you have to understand what others’ needs are. This is what the DISC theory helps with.
At this point, you should understand who falls into which category. You’re going to learn the general points on how to motivate every type – helpful in parenting, relationships and management.
- D Types – Type D’s are all about being in charge. They don’t mind taking the reins when
they need to; it means they don’t have to wait for others to follow them. They want to be in charge so they can motivate other people to do things. Type Ds don’t do well when their boss is a no-charge taking person. They’re all about getting to the heart of matters – to finish a task as efficiently as possible.
- I Types – I types are always looking for recognition for their success. They want somebody that will believe in them – to prove them they were right. They have this need to shine and be the center of someone’s world. If they accomplish a lime-lighting task, they thrive in it.
- S Types – They are more about giving support and feeling useful. They love being there for other people. And, it’s for that reason, they tend to be taken advantage of. People come to them for help, and they have problems saying no, even when they should. After they start a project, they see it to fruition. They love helping others but want to hear people recognize them for their efforts.
- C Types – They’re all about details – they are perfectionists and want to be sure everything is done to perfection. Their perfectionist nature ensures they become good at the things they desire to do. C types may come across as rigid and cold, but they like fitting in. They can accomplish this by offering the best quality work, mastering their skills and becoming an authority figure. They focus on their strengths.
While it sounds all easy and stuff, it’s never easy to motivate folks to do something they don’t feel comfortable doing. This is especially true if you attempt to motivate somebody that takes them out of their comfort zone.
As you learn more and more about the four types of behavior, you’ll begin seeing what type your friends, family and co-workers are. You’ll see they are an amalgamation of two or three types. You can use this information to motivate them – to appeal to their senses and approach them on their level.